Devotional: Hopelessness and the Treasures of Darkness

Reading: Isaiah 45:3 Do you know what hopelessness feels like? Not momentary, it’s dark now but the sun will shine again discouragement, but true hopelessness? It feels like a bowling ball sitting in your chest. A heaviness that makes it hard to breathe sometimes. The fatigue of knowing that when you go to sleep youContinue reading “Devotional: Hopelessness and the Treasures of Darkness”

Current Mood: Drunk Guy on a Roller Coaster

If I had to describe my current mood to an innocent bystander, I would call it drunk guy on a roller coaster.  I’ve been up and down, back and forth, on many things in recent months. I’m not the kind of person who looks forward to change or thinks a fresh start is anything closeContinue reading “Current Mood: Drunk Guy on a Roller Coaster”

Weekly Devotion: All We See is Manna

Reading: Numbers 11:6 I have a confession to make. Sometimes I have these blessings that come my way, but I am not happy about them. I decide that God must have misheard me because He did not send what I asked for. Instead of recognizing that in His wisdom and sovereignty, He is sending meContinue reading “Weekly Devotion: All We See is Manna”

How the Monkeys Saved My Birthday

I woke up in Asheville on my birthday. A few months ago after we stayed here, Other Half asked me what I wanted to do for my birthday, and I said, “Go back to the Grove Park.” I didn’t even want a present. I just wanted to sit on this beautiful rock porch (not nearlyContinue reading “How the Monkeys Saved My Birthday”

Weekly Devotion: Give Back Everything that Belongs to Her

2 Kings 8:6 My moods lately have been so unbelievably unpredictable. Some days I wake up full of hope and excitement, looking forward into the clear blue sky of possibilities, and other days I wake up and feel like I can’t see beyond my next heartbeat. The cycle of loss, grief, survival, repeat has drainedContinue reading “Weekly Devotion: Give Back Everything that Belongs to Her”

Weekly Devotion: Imperfect Circumstances, Perfect Peace

Reading: Isaiah 26:3; Matthew 8:18-20 I have recently discovered something. My love for predictability and stability are completely at odds with the life of faith that we as believers are called to live. This might be something that you have always understood, but it was sort of an epiphany to me. I mean, I don’tContinue reading “Weekly Devotion: Imperfect Circumstances, Perfect Peace”

Hiding in Other People’s Stories

Here’s something I’ve recently discovered about myself: When I am sad or overwhelmed or afraid or any other emotion that would cause me to gravitate towards comfort, I watch my favorite old movies or shows. I’ve never really done this before that I’m aware of, but lately my entire family is forced to tolerate thisContinue reading “Hiding in Other People’s Stories”

What It’s Like to Wait for a Transplant

My dad needs a liver transplant. He has been on the transplant list for a long time now, what actually feels like forever, but is actually just since July 2019-ish. My family and I have gone through the excitement, the hope, the fear. And then a lot of other things happened that seemed not fairContinue reading “What It’s Like to Wait for a Transplant”